my mom and grandma are looking at a bunch of old family pictures

Meme: yeah, he got killed by the mafia

Mom: ….

Me: WHO GOT KILLED BY THE MAFIA???

Meme: Homer

Me: WHO THE EFF IS HOMER?

Mom: He wasn’t related to us

Me: DAMNIT

My mom just walked into the room and yelled “DAMNIT, EVELYN, WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS” at me and then started giggling about how she had to kill me

“WHEN DOES THAT SHOW ABOUT THE BLACK POLICEMAN AND THE SERIAL KILLER LADY COME ON?”

My grandma doesn’t understand downloading TV but she sure does like Luther. 

My grandma and I were eating dinner and watching Criminal Minds

It’s her favorite show (besides the Casey Anthony trial) and I’ve never watched it except in bits and pieces when she has it on.

Jazzie: “How often do they end up killing suspects?”
MeMe: “Not often! Spencer had to kill one once!”
Jazzie: “WHY ARE YOU SMILING??”
MeMe: “I like him! He was so cute!”
Jazzie: “Because he killed someone?”
MeMe: “No!! How he reacted and was so ‘I-I shot him! and he-he DIED’ “